1. |
the syrup conspiracy
01:55
|
|||
|
what does it come from
maple leaves?
leaves aren't sweet
but they could be
but how?
i will be sure to think about this
sometimes it is shaped like a woman
who is this woman?
let's scan their fingerprints
let's track this woman down
the pancakes are the shape of time
as described by some guy
what was that guy's name?
i forgot who said it
how many people said that
but i'm getting off track
what is the correlation of syrup and time
overtime syrup turns into amber
amber alert
kidnapping
who was kidnapped?
i will be sure to think about this
the only lead so far is the woman
and i have found that she has no fingerprints
and the name jemima does not narrow things down
she could be the kidnapper or the kidnappee
or someone different entirely
what even is up with maple leaves why is canada so proud of those
i hate canada
i had a dream where my parents visited me
then they turned into bees
when i woke up i felt happy
bees do honey though not syrup
i am confused
i have comprised a unified theory of syrup
i will share it when i think of the right words
the syrup bottle woman is at my door
presumably to kill me
or to sell me syrup
if they are here to sell me syrup than i'm going to stop writing in this anyways
partly because i can't trust anyone with this information
mostly because i'm lazy
|
||||
2. |
|
|||
|
one day i threw a boomerang into a well and it never came back so there's some food for thought
|
||||
3. |
4d jenga i
05:14
|
|||
|
rule 1:
do not remove the pieces you can only see with one eye
rule 2:
if a piece you remove begins to appear somewhere else, put it back
rule 3:
do not use fire
rule 4:
use gloves covered in watches to handle the pieces so they know when you're playing the game
rule 5:
if your arm goes through the tower, close your eyes until you can't remember if it was there
rule 6:
if the tower falls, focus on the tower so it is the only object falling
rule 7:
pieces may become more than one piece. if you touch both of these pieces at once you will be doomed to float forever in the super sargasso sea
rule 8:
you may construct a penrose triangle with the pieces, but do not move any part of your body through the gap in the triangle
rule 9:
keep a piece of paper in handy to remind you where you are, what you are doing, and what time it is. include four signatures
rule 10:
have fun
|
||||
4. |
scorpion
00:17
|
|
||
|
(instrumental)
|
||||
5. |
spaghetti man
05:59
|
|
||
|
beware the spaghetti man
hes really stupid and dumb
and his face is dumb
he has a dumb face
|
||||
6. |
dog break
00:31
|
|||
|
time for a dog break
(girl whispering "dog break" weirdly)
time for a dog break
(girl whispering "dog break" weirdly)
|
||||
7. |
high five underwater
05:14
|
|||
|
i had a dream i went to this store and it sold beans but they wouldn't let me have any because i was too old so i went and found a different store and i thought it sold beans but it actually sold marbles so i went and asked if they had beans and the guy behind the counter left and went into a room and i waited for a while but then i decided to get a shovel and dug through the door and i saw a room full of geckos and they crawled over my feet only my feet though but then there were geckos on my hands and i had to eat my hands and i felt cold for some reason. anyways i had hands again since it was a dream and all that and then i went into a forest where a snake came up to me and said something, i couldn't hear it but i could see like a speech bubble and he said "dont the first itme," so i ran really fast until i was at this really big hole, and i started flying over it but then this airplane came that was on fire and it hit me and i stopped flying and fell into the hole and there was a weird old guy there that had a cane and he pointed at a door with his cane and i tried opening it but my hands were gone again, then the old guy shouted at me. no actual words he just yelled 'oghhh' and i woke up
|
||||
8. |
unconditional stop sign
00:15
|
|
||
|
the cars are stuck
the cars are still stuck
some drivers try to start a movement
but end up catching fire somehow
quite the conundrum i know
|
||||
9. |
cool pants guy
05:10
|
|||
|
here comes a guy
his pants are cool
everyone knows that it must be cool pants guy
everyone cheers; the appearance of cool pants guy is worthy of applause
cool pants guy is a very popular person
this is mainly because of his cool pants
people say,
"hello cool pants guy"
he replies,
"hey, i am cool pants guy"
this is true
people say,
"how are your pants so cool"
he does not answer, but instead he says again,
"hey, i am cool pants guy"
once again he is correct
this goes on for a while until cool pants guy goes into an alleyway and nobody can see where he'd gone
no one understands it
they assume that cool pants guy is a magician and has fooled them
this is probably what happened, but nobody truly knows
most magicians will admit to there being a secret (without saying it outright)
but cool pants guy never discusses it
some say it is truly magic
some say virtual reality is an oxymoron
some say clothes should not be spelt or pronounced the way it is
some say cool pants guy is a ghost
some say shut up that's dumb
some say ok you're right
the next day, cool pants guy will appear somewhere else
nobody sees how they got there
but they are instantly distracted by their cool pants
they are very cool
nobody discusses what makes them so cool
nobody actually remembers what they look like after he disappears
but everyone agrees they are pretty cool
sometimes cool pants guy is seen crying
sometimes though cool pants guy is seen having a good time
so we can agree that he does not experience a life too much different than ours
so anyways what do you think smash mouth's doing right now are they still a thing or
|
||||
10. |
outkast.wav
00:28
|
|
||
|
hello friends
i have this question
what is more good than a good?
(quite good)
i am sorry i did not catch that
what is more good than a good?
(quite good)
ok thank you
|
||||
11. |
4d jenga ii
07:14
|
|||
|
one time i saw a guy who was walking his cat, well i guess it might not have ben his cat, maybe he stole it, but he had a leash and everything and i asked him what was up with that and apparently sometimes that's a thing people do but i don't think the cat would really enjoy that since they're a lot more inactive than dogs and they kind of do their own thing
one time i saw a guy jogging with a sweater on and he looked like he was not having a very good time due to the fact that he was wearing a sweater, but that was his choice to wear a sweater so i don't feel that bad. now that i think about it though, maybe he wasn't originally jogging and he was running from something, like a bear. maybe there was a bear
one time i saw a guy who was yelling at people about ghosts because he thought he saw a ghost, or so he said, i don't know it was april fools day so maybe he was just doing a lame joke, he was kinda convincing though, he was totally acting like a guy who didn't know what he was talking about and did bad april fools jokes and also secretly wants to yell at people about ghosts but never gets the chance to
one time i saw a like, it was like a bird, and it had these yellow things on its eyes??? like above his eyes and there was a bit of blue, i don't know what kinda bird it was i've never seen that kind of bird before but anyways it went and grabbed a little kid and flew away with them
|
||||
12. |
eehhh
00:57
|
|||
|
yeah gandhi can teleport, why do you think no one found his body
|
||||
13. |
i want a belief
03:43
|
|||
|
this guy is super duper a alien i rest my case
|
||||
14. |
|
|||
|
hey
guys,
so
sometimes
my
dog
talks???
but
not
always
|
||||
15. |
||||
|
13 is a prominent number in my life
so is a lot of things though
i just take note of how many times i see 13 more than other numbers
which i guess would make it prominent still in that i spend time thinking about it
some people say 13 is an unlucky number
i have yet to find out why that is but that is mostly because i'm too lazy to care about looking it up
here is an example of 13 appearing
the expiration date for the milk i purchased is on the 13th month
i guess this one is weirder than others but it could have been a printing error so i didn't think anything of it
somebody might say hey it's magic and i'd say no shut up
but nobody's said that because i don't really talk to people or go very far outside unless i'm going to the store
it must seem weird always living indoors to someone who goes outdoors frequently
they might think about how i have this one small world that i leave sometimes to go visit other planets with things i need on them
that sounds like a video game that probably exists
i remember once some guy said he achieved no joy or any other emotions from a video game or a board game
that's reasonable i guess
there are lots of weird things that exist, like noise music
noise music is like when you see a crazy person watching static
but it's audio and the person listening is not crazy
but he is still enjoying how loud it is
it hurts my ears though.
sometimes there's 17 minutes worth of noise music that you can listen to
as its own song i mean. there are also hour long albums of noise music
so i guess my point is people are weird sometimes but thats fine i'm fine with that
oh and also 13 is a thing
|
||||
16. |
fryusfacvxfgh
00:39
|
|
||
|
zazswxdec
xdefthujntfdedc vtrrv
ujkmyhtgrf edsdwqs gh
fdfg rfehgthj tref grfhrt
fedge d
tg jtrrdew jyt re r
ew gr
r fgre
rffegfre
rge g rgehgtrhbg
fregtr
|
||||
17. |
gubble
06:05
|
|||
|
imagine a forest with trees that are pitch black and grass that's white as snow (but it's not snow)
imagine what it would look like on fire
imagine what it would look like after the fire ends
imagine what it would look like after a meteor hits that spot
imagine what it would look like if it didn't exist
would it look like something?
a colour? black? white?
how could it be a colour
there is no colour
there wouldn't be anything
so yeah that was pretty much a trick question
have you played gubble it's a pretty obscure game it's ok i guess
|
||||
18. |
|
|||
|
some mountains form sideways
frogs aren't purple
the time books were discovered is unknown
nanaimo bars fit in nanaimo bar-shaped holes almost perfectly
salmons have hidden feathers
infants have the potential to run faster than any adult
play-doh is made with coins
metal only melts if it is dark out
the sun will stop working eventually but batteries will arrive shortly after
when you turn on the light and blink at the same time it will get darker
five is the only number that cats cannot think of
ghosts have hands but only in a humid environment
clouds make noises similar to a recorder
sometimes dogs are born thinking their eyes are box-shaped
pumpkins explode when provoked
giraffes have longer necks when they are depressed
plants have millions of teeth
people's skeletons turn transparent the first time their spirit screams
school was invented by a dog
orange is not a real colour
|
||||
If you like dreamsaboutdogs, you may also like:
A gentle and moving posthumous release from Eric Littmann, known for his work with Emily Yacina, Yohuna, and more.
go to album
Jasper Ewing brings all manner of electronic equipment to his bright, jittery songs, resulting in tiny, sparkling melodic wonders.
go to album
Boing!
by Bex Burch & Leafcutter John
Pioneering electronic artist Leafcutter John and gyil player Bex Burch come together for an exuberant, largely improvised jazz-fusion set.
go to album
Additions Megabus
by Trash Panda QC
Four live sets from 2017 - 2020 showcase the inventive experimental electronic music of Trash Panda QC, by turns surreal & sensational.
go to album
Stern, stiff-limbed and cyberpunky, the latest from ph4nt re-imagines Gary Numan as a 21st Century anarchist.
go to album
The sophomore from club music artist Rebel Yell features four-on-the-floor anthems.
go to album
Langue - EP
by K.Board & The Skreens
K.Board & The Skreens, from Italy, turn pop inside-out on these four tracks; the hooks are there to be sure, but they’re gloriously mutated.
go to album
